Hong
Zhang
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Im saying it for the last time and im not going to explain anymore
One fine day, we had pe and i was playing along with rafidah
spit at is not like use ur saliva and spit in her face it is water
ok i admit i sld nt have done that but funnily enogh nadiah got it too and she makes no comments
then i didnt know that rafidah would be that affected by it cos she was LAUGHING along
rafidah it is nt ur fault okay, nt being sacarstic
just that i really didnt know she was affected cos she was smiling amd like hit me back and smiling all the time
how in the %$%^$*( would i know that i affected her by doing it if she laughs all the time?
jus imgine somebody took ur bag
u want it back
do u ask seriously or keep laughing and then ask for it back?
eunice says in msn that she wouldnt want to seem weak by nt being happy
crap
crap
crap
if she would not want to seem weak, she could have just walked away right?
and i would know right away that she was hurt and then stop everything
but if she keeps laughing, HOW WOULD I KNOW SHE IS HURT?
and im nt pushing the blame to her
why cant girls just show what they want to tell us?
and eunice can u stop trying to be such a attention seeker and want a part in everything that is happening?
dont u realise that in every quarrel between boys and girls, those that does nt even affect u, u would want to be in apart of it and start blaming how lowlife how sucky boys are?
start comparing ur self to us and trust me, u wont find much diff
man im trying to change but u guys are nt even trying to help me okay, i didnt want to hurt rafidah that much but she didnt tell me the golden word `stop` and if u say im too much? how would i know if im too much if nobody tells me? it is not about common sense
am i too much if the person u claim i am doing too much to her is laughing?
and rafidah it is just not ur fault and im nt trying to express that u are in the wrong but i cant find another way to phrase this sentence
i want to change man
but for every single mistake i make, even when i feel i didnt do much, u guys want to make me the main problem
trouble seems to be attracted to me in some way
and every problem i have, it is because of u girls
girls that hide that feelings and smile when ur angry ( im not refering to u , rafidah )
God didnt create adam to guess what eve was feeling
and i dont care what the girls will reply in the tag box cos i dont need girls anymre
all that is important to me is not to do with girls
if i made alist,they wont appear in top 50
i want to change but are u even trying to help or make matters worse for me?
if u are the latter, then get the hell out of my life
im nt gonna say im okay and im feeling so happy right now cos im not

ME
Ong Hong Zhang- Child of God. Found love, beyond all reason.
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